What Leftists believe

For anybody who is concerned that leftists might sometimes have contradictory beliefs, this table should allay their fears:

Subject	What Leftists believe	What Leftists believe
Climate change	The most catastrophic thing in the history of the world (with the exception of Islamophobia and the creation of the State of Israel)	Fantastic opportunity to stop all economic development in capitalist countries
Academic freedom	Academic freedom is sacrosanct and universal	Boycott all Israeli academics and ‘Islamophobes’
Boycotts 1	Boycotting Israel is a fundamental human right.	Those who attempt to boycott the boycotters are fascist scum.
Boycotts 2	The law must be used to boycott Israeli goods and services	Using the law to stop our boycotts of Israeli goods and services is a breach of our human rights
Freedom of speech 1	Freedom of speech is sacrosanct and universal	No platform for Israelis, no platform for ‘Islamophobes’, in fact no platform for anybody we don't agree with.
Freedom of speech 2	We have the freedom of speech to demand Israelis are not allowed to speak	Those who try to stop us allowing Israelis to speak are breaching our human rights and our freedom of speech
Antisemitism	Antisemitism, like Islamophobia, must always be condemned	The Zionists control America. The Zionists control the media, The Zionists control the world banking system,  etc
The Holocaust	The Holocaust was a uniquely terrible event in history that must never be denied or downplayed	Holocaust deniers raise many legitimate points. Anyway, the Israelis continually use the Holocaust for their own benefit while committing a similar Holocaust on the Palestinians.
Peace partners and friends	Hamas, Hezbollah, Taliban, ISIS, the IRA – all legitimate freedom fighting resistance movements who we must negotiate with and befriend	Every Israeli politician must be arrested for war crimes. Tony Blair and George Bush must be arrested as war criminals.
Terrorism	(When Islamist groups like those above deliberately target and slaughter civilians). This is a robust and inevitable act of political resistance  against Imperialist oppression	(When children who Islamists deliberately use as human shields in areas from where they are firing rockets are accidentally killed). Israel (NATO, US, UK) guilty of state terrorism.
Nuclear energy	Must be banned in every country of the world	Iran has an absolute right to nuclear energy
Nuclear weapons	Must be banned in every country of the world	Iran has an absolute right to nuclear weapons
Immigration and freedom of movement	There should be no international borders – every person has a right to live wherever they want	Not a single Jew has a right to live in their historic homeland
Eviction	Evicting any person from their home – even if they have lived there for a matter of hours is a crime against humanity	Jews living in Israel (including those who are over a hundred and have never lived anywhere else, and the 60% whose families originate from the Middle East and Africa)  should be forcibly ‘returned to the USA and Europe’.
Ethnic cleansing	Attempts to resettle two Arab families illegally squatting in Jewish owned buildings in Jerusalem is ethnic cleansing and must be stopped.	All 600,000 Jews who live on the “West Bank” and legally bought their land and houses must be forcibly removed.
Racism	Any oppression of people because of their race, colour, or religion is a crime against humanity and must be aggressively confronted wherever it occurs	Muslim oppression of Jews and Christians is a natural reaction to the crimes of the West; Muslim oppression of blacks and other non-Muslims is just a natural cultural phenomenon
Gay rights	Any discrimination of people because of their sexual orientation is a crime against humanity and must be aggressively confronted	Opposing the death penalty for gays in Muslim countries is a colonialist attitude that shows a racist insensitivity to traditional Muslim culture.
Feminism	Any oppression of women is a crime against humanity and must be aggressively confronted	Any attempt to highlight oppression of women in Islamic countries is colonialist attitude that shows a racist insensitivity to traditional Muslim culture.
Colonialism	All colonialists are evil racists who must be destroyed	Islamic colonial conquests of the West are necessary for multicultural diversity
Nationalism	All forms of nationalism are racist	Arab nationalists are heroes
Capital Punishment	Must be universally banned. No government ever has the right to take a life no matter how serious the crime.	The fact that Muslim countries like Iran hang thousands of people each year (mostly political prisoners) has nothing to with us – those criminals were probably really evil child murderers or even worse - Zionist collaborators
Forced Conformity	Forcing people to dress in a particular way is a crime against freedom and humanity	People who complain about women being forced to wear the burka are racist Islamophobes
War generally	The ultimate horror and always to be avoided at all costs	We are all Hezbollah, We are all Hamas. Bomb Israel!
Weapons	All weapons everywhere in the world should be made illegal and destroyed	We must arm Hamas, Hezbollah as they are freedom fighting heroes
Armed intervention in other countries	We must never intervene -  if we do they (the Muslims) will have every right to hate us and terrorise us	We must organize a UN force to stop any kind of violence against Muslims by non-Muslims.
The right to self defence	Israel and the West has no right to self-defence against acts of terrorism	Muslim acts of terrorism are always valid acts of self-defence
Religion	Religion is the opium of the masses. It should be ridiculed and banned	All aspects of Islam must be respected
Impact of Religion	Religion causes wars	Islam is the religion of peace

See also:

• Alternative spin on this article
• Previous version of this article
• The Corbyn family's compulsive obsessive anti-Israel disorder
• Academics on racism
• The difference between anti-Zionism and antisemitism
• Comparison between radical leftists and Islamists  
• Unions vote to boycott themselves